Last week, after learning about the gang rape at Richmond High School, the very same school the movie Coach Carter is based on, I wondered if we had sunk too low to be saved. The idea that people watched this poor girl get gang raped for two hours while not one of them called 911 makes them just as culpable as those who committed this heinous crime. Granted, they didn't commit the rapes, but as proven in the true case behind the movie The Accused, people who fall prey to the Bystander Effect are just as responsible. Witnesses walked by, watched for a few minutes, and then would leave. Even if terrified that the rapists would turn on them, I'm sure every one of them had a cell phone that has a 9 and a 1 on it, and how hard would it have been to dial anonymously? But not one person did. I'm disgusted to be a human being when I hear about tragedies like this. Those people will have to live with themselves for the rest of their lives, and I hope it haunts them every moment of every day.
Even with that having just happened, I have renewed faith. I left nearly $500 worth of jewelry in a Brighton tin in a restroom at Wilson's Fitness Center the other day. I was changing to work out, and I simply forgot to put it in my bag. The tin got left on the back of a toilet. When I realized what had happened (at midnight, mind you), I frantically called. The late night worker didn't know, but he insisted I call the manager the next morning. When I did, she informed me that the tin was safe and sound in her desk, and I could pick it up any time. Wow. Whoever picked it up, and I wish I knew who it was, you have renewed my faith that not everyone is like those at Richmond High School who saw and did nothing. Good people still walk among us and remind me that there's still hope.
If only we could send everyone else to Siberia.
Saturday, November 7, 2009
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Everything Matters
I spent the day with my mom going through a neuro series to determine what her memory issues officially are. It confirms what I've always believed: everything matters.
Tell those close to you that you love them...every day.
Tell people you work with how much you appreciate them...every chance you get.
Hold a hand out for a stranger, open the door for someone who needs it, and pay it forward in all ways possible. Choose your words wisely, because people will never forget them: if they're inspiring, then what an impact you'll have.
The best adage to embrace is one I learned in Hawaii two summers ago: live well, love much, laugh often. And believe Maya Angelou when she said that people will forget what you said and what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel.
Don't wait to do these things. Someone may need it today more than ever.
Tell those close to you that you love them...every day.
Tell people you work with how much you appreciate them...every chance you get.
Hold a hand out for a stranger, open the door for someone who needs it, and pay it forward in all ways possible. Choose your words wisely, because people will never forget them: if they're inspiring, then what an impact you'll have.
The best adage to embrace is one I learned in Hawaii two summers ago: live well, love much, laugh often. And believe Maya Angelou when she said that people will forget what you said and what you did, but they will never forget how you made them feel.
Don't wait to do these things. Someone may need it today more than ever.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
Mixing Politics and School...
So I've been mired in a new school year of teaching classes, the last of my PhD courses, and just life in general. But an issue is burning for me...so I'm resurrecting my blog from the brink of obscurity.
So the issue begins... Regardless of which side of the political spectrum you lean toward (and don't many of us actually hover somewhere in that middle space now known as No-Man's Land?), we still live in America. But something a local radio host said in Columbia last week bothered me immensely. (It was either in the newspaper or a magazine, I don't remember, but my MU students were bothered enough to bring it up in class.)
It started when our current President chose to speak to school children, just as a few Republican presidents have done in recent terms. This was not a new innovation on the President's part. However, THIS time, it caused a ruckus in Columbia, and this man (let's call him Barney for ease of identification) said something to the effect of, "That would be a good day for your kids to skip school."
So much for all the rest of the work your child would be doing the other seven and a half hours that day...
If George Bush had still been President, and this statement had been made by a Democrat, he'd be considered anti-American. But with the tables turned, this community leader, er, Barney, just taught his children that it's okay to disrespect this country, his school, his teachers, and his peers. No matter whether I like Obama or Bush or McCain or Palin, once one of them wins, he or she is MY President. And if highly conservative people -- and radically liberal people as well -- can't put aside their differences and embrace every President as their own, then the schism between the parties and this country will continue to grow. Children watch their parents and want them to be role models. Being judgmental, hypocritical, and blatantly disrespectful of the greatest office in the greatest country on the planet sends a horrible message to not only Barney's children, but those who might not understand the political stance and see it simply as a show of disrespect. There are disenfranchised teenagers out there listening, thinking, "Well, hey, if Barney says I don't gotta go to school, then I ain't goin'."
Really, Barney, that's the message you want sent to this community? To your children and every other child who hears it? I'm left wondering, when a President is elected you DO endorse, how will you explain the difference to your children?
So the issue begins... Regardless of which side of the political spectrum you lean toward (and don't many of us actually hover somewhere in that middle space now known as No-Man's Land?), we still live in America. But something a local radio host said in Columbia last week bothered me immensely. (It was either in the newspaper or a magazine, I don't remember, but my MU students were bothered enough to bring it up in class.)
It started when our current President chose to speak to school children, just as a few Republican presidents have done in recent terms. This was not a new innovation on the President's part. However, THIS time, it caused a ruckus in Columbia, and this man (let's call him Barney for ease of identification) said something to the effect of, "That would be a good day for your kids to skip school."
So much for all the rest of the work your child would be doing the other seven and a half hours that day...
If George Bush had still been President, and this statement had been made by a Democrat, he'd be considered anti-American. But with the tables turned, this community leader, er, Barney, just taught his children that it's okay to disrespect this country, his school, his teachers, and his peers. No matter whether I like Obama or Bush or McCain or Palin, once one of them wins, he or she is MY President. And if highly conservative people -- and radically liberal people as well -- can't put aside their differences and embrace every President as their own, then the schism between the parties and this country will continue to grow. Children watch their parents and want them to be role models. Being judgmental, hypocritical, and blatantly disrespectful of the greatest office in the greatest country on the planet sends a horrible message to not only Barney's children, but those who might not understand the political stance and see it simply as a show of disrespect. There are disenfranchised teenagers out there listening, thinking, "Well, hey, if Barney says I don't gotta go to school, then I ain't goin'."
Really, Barney, that's the message you want sent to this community? To your children and every other child who hears it? I'm left wondering, when a President is elected you DO endorse, how will you explain the difference to your children?
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Teacher Book Arrives!
I just received the new book My First Year in the Classroom, with a story I wrote in it! I'm excited! You can check it out on Amazon at: http://www.amazon.com/First-Year-Classroom-Celebrate-Unforgettable/dp/1605506540/ref=sr_1_10?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1249243851&sr=1-10
Many teachers contributed, and it's got some great insight in it for new and veteran teachers! Since it's a compilation like this, it was a one-time payment to contributors, so if you'd like a copy, please email me at barribum@aol.com and request an autographed copy! It's fun to have a new and different book out!! :-)
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Summer Chaos
I've been immersed in the Missouri Writing Project Advanced Institute this summer, and while it's sad to be so busy you don't blog or write about your experiences until after the fact, it's rejuvenating to feel the breath release knowing there's still weeks until school starts with endless days to create.
To surround myself with writers is like a buoy for me. It lifts me, allows me to tread and gawk at those around me with the gift to leave me in awe. These two weeks at the MWP have done that. Amazing writing generates amazing emotions. And on the tail of those, the words that flow can't be slowed or squelched, even if they're rambling. The stream of consciousness that often comes is so refreshing, and then the channeled writing can come.
This is my rambling. Saturday I'll buckle down to work on my new Danna Scanlon book, and all the energy can help her solve her next case. And it's gonna be a doozy...
To surround myself with writers is like a buoy for me. It lifts me, allows me to tread and gawk at those around me with the gift to leave me in awe. These two weeks at the MWP have done that. Amazing writing generates amazing emotions. And on the tail of those, the words that flow can't be slowed or squelched, even if they're rambling. The stream of consciousness that often comes is so refreshing, and then the channeled writing can come.
This is my rambling. Saturday I'll buckle down to work on my new Danna Scanlon book, and all the energy can help her solve her next case. And it's gonna be a doozy...
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
New Project
Now that I tweet on Twitter and put updates on Facebook, I'm not nearly as good about blogging... (my publicist has found the coolest application that allows me to do all those sites through one place...)
But I've started a project that's worthy of a blog... Karen Althage, a breast cancer survivor, approached me about writing her story. She's amazing, and she's given me the motivation to write about something important, and something that ALL of us need to support. After several months of interviewing her, I participated in a "breast casting" event on Sunday that is exactly what it sounds like; women from Columbia came together to have their breasts immortalized in plaster of paris, and then artists from around the area will paint them. The final products will be sold at an art show in October. Many of the women have been touched by breast cancer in some way, and some were even breast cancer survivors themselves. It was amazing, and it puts life in perspective to see women embrace their lives, their futures when faced with such a challenge. It puts the pettiness of other things out on a limb and reminds us to focus on the tree, on the trunk, and those closest to us.
Karen and some other women are founders of the Vincent P. Gurucharri Foundation, complete with Karen doing a video for the Susan G. Komen Breast Cancer Foundation and helping organize a fundraiser that had Carl Edwards giving away NASCAR memorabilia and signing autographs. I'm honored to now be part of something so significant and hope this book raises awareness that even though 1 in 7 women will get breast cancer, 88% will survive it...
Monday, May 4, 2009
Those Who Judge…
Hatred, I’ve learned, can come in pretty packages... And often it’s cloaked in ways that make it more than pretty, angelic even. It’s scary how many people have some elemental quality they hate in another human being, and that person or that quality often never intersect in any way. So where does the hatred come from? Psychologists would say it’s an innate fear of being the hated, but perhaps it’s a deeper chasm forming in our country.
I find it disturbing how divisive we’ve become. Our nation has gone extreme, on both sides, and that leaves most of us who hover in the middle left to wonder…why are we all so quick to judge, to hate, to try so hard to tell others how they should live? We knock anyone who doesn’t worship our God; we spit on anyone who loves a person we’re disgusted with; we feel compelled to judge to the point of hatred. And I use the pronoun loosely. I’m not an atheist, nor agnostic. I was saved and baptized when I was in junior high, but I subscribe first to the adage, “Take out your mirror before getting out the magnifying glass.” I believe that’s what God wants – for us to live a good life, to be good people, to be a good example for all those watching us. What message do we send kids when we pass judgment on others? No matter another person’s crime, no matter their indiscretions, their beliefs, their sins, it’s not for us to say. I cringe when I hear an outspoken Bush-hater, even more when I listen to a blind Bush-worshipper. We are no longer allowed to have our own unspoken beliefs, no longer left alone if we announce an allegiance to one side or the other. Instead, both sides insist on converting us, saving us from ourselves, even if we don’t want or need saving.
Just once I’d like to be able to say, “I voted for…” or “I think everyone should be allowed to marry…” or “The war in Iraq is…” without getting an earful of hatred from someone on the opposing side. As we’ve become so obsessed with being PC, we’ve also gotten too opinionated to carry on a real conversation about a heated issue. If we want our kids to form opinions of their own, how can we show them that if none of us ever really listens? How do we teach tolerance when a huge majority don’t practice it?
How will we change narrow-minded views if only the open-minded are paying attention? If we’re only preaching to the choir, then does that mean the choir doesn’t have a mind of their own?
To anyone out there who truly cringes at the thought of their child marrying someone of a different race, the same sex, or a card-carrying member of a different religion, why do you think you feel that way? Just once, stop and think about it, take a look at yourself, and ask, Why do I judge someone who has nothing against me?
We should all subscribe to the adage, “Take out your mirror before getting out the magnifying glass.” It would be a great place to live if we really judged not.
I find it disturbing how divisive we’ve become. Our nation has gone extreme, on both sides, and that leaves most of us who hover in the middle left to wonder…why are we all so quick to judge, to hate, to try so hard to tell others how they should live? We knock anyone who doesn’t worship our God; we spit on anyone who loves a person we’re disgusted with; we feel compelled to judge to the point of hatred. And I use the pronoun loosely. I’m not an atheist, nor agnostic. I was saved and baptized when I was in junior high, but I subscribe first to the adage, “Take out your mirror before getting out the magnifying glass.” I believe that’s what God wants – for us to live a good life, to be good people, to be a good example for all those watching us. What message do we send kids when we pass judgment on others? No matter another person’s crime, no matter their indiscretions, their beliefs, their sins, it’s not for us to say. I cringe when I hear an outspoken Bush-hater, even more when I listen to a blind Bush-worshipper. We are no longer allowed to have our own unspoken beliefs, no longer left alone if we announce an allegiance to one side or the other. Instead, both sides insist on converting us, saving us from ourselves, even if we don’t want or need saving.
Just once I’d like to be able to say, “I voted for…” or “I think everyone should be allowed to marry…” or “The war in Iraq is…” without getting an earful of hatred from someone on the opposing side. As we’ve become so obsessed with being PC, we’ve also gotten too opinionated to carry on a real conversation about a heated issue. If we want our kids to form opinions of their own, how can we show them that if none of us ever really listens? How do we teach tolerance when a huge majority don’t practice it?
How will we change narrow-minded views if only the open-minded are paying attention? If we’re only preaching to the choir, then does that mean the choir doesn’t have a mind of their own?
To anyone out there who truly cringes at the thought of their child marrying someone of a different race, the same sex, or a card-carrying member of a different religion, why do you think you feel that way? Just once, stop and think about it, take a look at yourself, and ask, Why do I judge someone who has nothing against me?
We should all subscribe to the adage, “Take out your mirror before getting out the magnifying glass.” It would be a great place to live if we really judged not.
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